unto You be all the glory

i know, i know what every one of yall are thinking. WELCOME to blog world, Alex!
I remember xanga days, it was quite a few years back. I never did write about the overflow of my heart, it was mostly just music and, what my day consisted of (sometimes) and... more music. kind of lame, it lacked any sort of depth, but nevertheless i had fun doing it. It would have never crossed my mind to create another one but my friend, Mallory, advised me that it was "the most theraeputic thing she had ever done!". I value what Mallory says, since she is my best friend, and quickly decided to create my very own blogspot. It didnt take long, she just left my house an hour ago ;)

I sit here now, pondering the part of my life/heart i would like to express, which will be marked forever and always. I realize that what i am about to post can never be taken back or written off as though it never existed. Even if I were to decide 2 weeks from now that I hated everything I posted and disregaurded everything that i had thought and written it would still have happened. I mean, I could go back and delete my entire blogsite, but who knows...maybe one of yall decided to print and save every one of my posts. (not that you would, that would be totally creepy!) I would have no way of knowing, but no matter what it will be impossible to completely erase. So these posts are going down for the record, FOR FOREVER! I could look back on these years from now and say "i dont like the way i wrote". I could erase the things from my memory that i dont like to think about, forget about them and press on. But why not choose to embrace? Its all a process anyway isnt it? I didnt accept Jesus into my life so that I could be happy go-lucky 100% of the time, altough at the time it felt like that because i had never experienced such abundant joy. I chose Him to endure suffering, pain, hardships and enjoy pleasure and happiness. Experiencing all of these emotions many times in the same day, even in the same moment! Its the reality of embracing the process playing out in my life. Like when Paul had the thorn in his flesh and he asked the Lord 3 times to remove it! God refused to do so, and said to Paul "My grace is suffecient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness" And Paul went on boasting about this thorn that the Lord has allowed Satan to torment him with. Can you imagine Paul's emotions about this situation? He felt joy and anguish at the same time! This can only happen with the Lord! I can relate to Paul in this moment of appreciating the process and choosing the will of the Lord, and the hope that He has given all of His children when He said that His grace is sufficent! I will welcome with open arms this grace that has been freely given to me, and thank my daddy in heaven for what He has given me thusfar. I will never erase it from my memory, or the computer screen. I will praise His name for the gifts He has showered over me, a thankful heart prepares the way of the Lord!

so maybe this doesnt make sense, maybe i need to brush up on my writing skills (for my pride's sake, it has been a good year since i have written anything that would be publicly viewed), but if nothing else, at least this was therepeutic, can i get an amen?

Praise His name for He is GOOD!